Best 60+ Funny Status and Funny Quotes in English

Life is a tough journey, as it contains both happy times and sad times. It becomes problematic in dark times when you get so depressed that even you stop smiling. You will feel that the whole world is falling apart, and this feeling will tear you apart. But that’s the time when you should be cheered up. You need to feel relaxed and happy in those times. It can happen through reading or looking at some funny status and quotes.

Sadness and happiness are both parts of our life. No doubt, satisfaction is the best feeling in the world to experience, and grief is what no one wants to face. But, the time lived with both of the emotions can be better with some jokes and funny status lines to read. A happy day becomes happier with reading some funny jokes, whereas sad and dark times can be at least a bit light on ourselves with some humor in our life.

Why is laughter important?

Laughing is said to be the best therapy. A laughter a day keeps the doctor away. Laughter is known as the best medicine to cure a person because, when a person is happy, he tends to forget about his problems and stress for a while that leaves his mind relaxed for some time. A sick person recovers faster in an environment that is filled with humorous elements, love, and laughter rather than the person who’s already ill and is living in a foreboding atmosphere. It makes them feel more vulnerable. To make the environment happy and humorous, we have compiled the best funny status and funny quotes in this article, especially for you. In this world full of stress, tensions, and so many other sad things, we have these funny status and funny quotes for you because we care for you.

What can these funny status and quotes do?

With these funny status and quotes, you can make your day, as well as someone else’s. Share this funny status and quotes with your friends and family to give them the day’s dose of laughter. In this world of social media, you can also use this funny status and quotes on your Whatsapp, Instagram, and Facebook stories to give your virtual family a laugh. Making someone smile is the best and the most beautiful thing you can do for them. Do your deed and present your offering to happiness, love, and laughter by sharing these funny quotes and funny status with them. Below you will find the best collection of funny status and funny quotes that you can use.

Here are the Collection of Funny Status and Quotes

Best Funny Status :

Whenever I find key to success, someone changes the lock.

If stress burn calories, I’ll be a supermodel.

Never give up on your dreams, keep sleeping.

If you’re not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?

I love buying new things but I hate spending money.

People said to follow your dreams so I went back to bed.

I want to be invited but I don’t want to go.

If you don’t succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.

I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice.

I hate people who steal my ideas before I think of them.

Fair warning: I know karate. …and some other words.

Yes, I do bad things, but I do them well.

Drink until you become the greatest philosopher in your world!

You bring out the best insults in me.

Keep moving! Nothing new to read.

All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

I have a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.

 

My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry.

I don’t always have time to study, but when I do, I don’t.

Never make eye contact while eating a banana.

I like to hang out with people that make me forget to look at my phone.

I am 100% done with today and about 37% done with tomorrow.

Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.

Save paper, don’t do homework.

I work out every day I do one sit-up every morning when I wake up.

I’m just having an allergic reaction to the universe.

New Funny Status for Facebook & Whatsapp :

God is really creative, I mean just look at me.

Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.

Sleep till you’re hungry… Eat till you’re sleepy.

Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software… it’s called Monday, please fix it.

The thing I have learned from college is that not finishing a project is not the end of the world

I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

The only thing I gained so far in this year is weight.

My teacher today gave 45 minute speech about not wasting time.

If I agreed with you we both were wrong.

Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.

Mosquitoes are like family, annoying but they carry your blood.

Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.

Men have feelings too. For example, we feel hungry.

Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork.

One day, I’m gonna make the onions cry.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see.

If Monday had a face, I would punch it.

Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.

Life is too short to be serious all the time. So if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me I will laugh at you.

I want someone to give me a Loan & then leave me alone.

Best Funny Quotes :

“All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.”
– Alexander Woollcott

“Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?”
– Benny Hill

“If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you.”
– Billy Wilder

“There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.”
– Mindy Kaling

“I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they’re going and hook up with ’em later.”
– Mitch Hedberg

“As a child my family’s menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.”
– Buddy Hackett

“I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.”
– Les Dawson

“You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is ‘never try.’”
– Homer Simpson

“We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.”
– Bryan White

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.
– Steven Wright

“My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.”
– Ashleigh Brilliant

They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.
– Clint Eastwood

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
– George Carlin

“Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.”
– Ellen DeGeneres

“Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.”
– David Letterman

“You’re only as good as your last haircut.”
– Fran Lebowitz

“I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.”
– Jimmy Kimmel

We hope we made you laugh! If we did, share those funny status and messages with your dear ones and make them laugh too!

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